Soviet big missile button switch, surplus

The internet is full of DIY nuke guides. There are mainly two problems: collecting radioactive material from smoke alarms is a bloody chore and you just can't find a good launch button from anywhere. Well, at least one of these problems has been remedied!

These missile launch buttons are genuine ex-Soviet hardware, and considering how serious they were about explosive things that level everything, these are superbly well made. There are two options: red and black. Perhaps one for nukes and one for chemical weapons? You cannot find such buttons from even the largest shopping malls, at least not for this price!

Operation

The button is not ON/OFF type. You slam it, it goes down. You lift your fist, it goes up. It has a simple attachment for wires on both sides. Peel the ends, stick them in the holes, and tighten the screws. There are two ways for wiring, depending on which side you attach the wires to:

• Press the button, contact surfaces engage
• Press the button, contact surfaces separate

It gives endless possibilities for all kinds of testicle torture devices and such. And yeah, we know everyone dreams of a cute little missile base, but let's not forget that this button has other more peaceful uses as well. Who could resist using it for a doorbell, sure to make the mind wander: "If I press this, which part of this building will collapse, or does something just fly directly into Washington? Do I get an electric shock? Does someone else?"

The plastic washers around the button can be screwed off, so you can just drill a hole on the platform of your choice and bolt the button on.

Genuine Soviet surplus

The story is the same old classic: these were stocked in some Soviet-governed military base in a country behind the Iron Curtain, and when the Cold War ended, someone found these and "made a fortune" with them. These are all unused, still waiting for their first hot launch!

Varusteleka button warranty!

This button does not fail! That's why we're prepared to give it a warranty of functionality. If your button breaks in use, we will replace it as long as we have these in stock. Just send us a frustrating image of the non-functionality, preferably with an accompanying sour text about how this ruined your supervillain fantasies.